Fever all through the night

Cabin Fever 2: Spring Fever(2009)

Cabin Fever 2 is not so much a film that was released, as escaped, and you could say that the escape was only partially successful as it was on one screen for only one show in Austin, TX, two years after it was made. I went to this screening that the director himself had boycotted after having his film taken away and re-cut, expecting a train wreck. Instead, I got an unloved mongrel of a film, as much slapstick comedy as gory horror. It’s not remotely scary but must be admired for how determinedly it tests the audiences’ gag reflex. The gore effects are good, but unlike the original, we don’t really get the time to see them fester before people die, apart from the bus/genitals/ swimming pool highlights. I actually preferred it to Eli Roth’s original, because whereas the original left me feeling cheated by its moments of absurdity, this pinned out its comedy credentials from the onset, as much Porky’s(1982) as Bodymelt(1993). In fact, that’s wrong, there’s also a strong dash of John Hughes, and the real shame about CF2, is that when it’s good, in the teenage anxiety of the first half, it promises to be a much better film than it turns out to be. We could also have done without(unless perhaps in a cameo at the start or in a gruesome death), the return of Sheriff Winston from the first film. Annoyingly, it seems at one stage as though he’s going to grow from comic relief into hero, ala Ash in The Evil Dead trilogy, or Malcolm in Jurassic Park(1993), only for this to be thrown away in favor of tension sapping comedy scenes, to cut away to, every time the Crazies(1973) like ending shows signs of getting suspenseful. CF2 then feels strangely unfinished but also overburdened with unnecessary subplots, but it definitely deserves a dvd rental, and sadly is still more fun than most of the horror movies that get released. And although a 28 Weeks Later(2007) third part seems offered at the end, we’re probably not that interested to warrant one. 5/10

Wax On, Wax Off.

The Karate Kid (1984)

Even 25 years after the fact, watching The Karate Kid for the first time, I can see why it became a hit with teenagers everywhere, and also despair at the fact that it puts most modern teenage movies to shame (come to think of it most modern movies are remakes of the old ones), despite being Rocky Jr. Same director, same soundtrack composer, and you can hear Stallone in many of Ralph Macchio’s utterances, especially when trying to woo Elizabeth Shue. I half expected him to shout, “Yo Adrian, I did it,” at the end. It’s been stated before but what keeps KK from sinking into the mire of straight to dvd releases, and differentiates it, is the relationship between Daniel and Mr Miyagi which is a sweet natured if hard to believe friendship. Shue adds the usual polished performance from this period and Cagney and Lacey’s Martin Kove, on his second most memorable villain duty after Rambo 2, makes a hilariously hissable baddy- even his club has an evil name. Like Rocky, it also deservedly spawned a fistful of sequels, but the original deserves to share shelf space with Back to the Future and Ghostbusters as one of the 80s best. 9/10 Also, Bananarama featured on a soundtrack isn’t exactly commonplace even in English movies of the time, and cheered me up that they got the work

The Witching Hour is Upon Us.

Trick R Treat (2008)

Praised to the rafters by all who’ve seen it, yet left on a shelf for two years by it’s myopic distributer, Trick R Treat finally escapes to dvd. And while it is unfair that it misses out on a totally deserved theatrical release( it puts 90% of horror movies in cinemas to shame with the quality of its cast, script, look and direction), it probably has found its true home, where it can become a holiday fixture to replace John Carpenter’s Halloween(1978), which has been doing all of the heavy lifting single handedly for 30 years. Basically an anthology in the Creepshow(1982) guise, complete with animated inserts, it also brings back happy memories of the best episodes of the Tales from the Crypt series. The joy is that also unlike similar films, no particular story stands out as weak, although the serial killer/werewolf strands could have taken more time, at least they don’t get boring. Brian Cox’s fight with a demon and the ghosts of the murdered children are superior, but it’s also refreshing how the stories both stand alone but also support and guide each other. As stated, the look and color scheme is beautiful mixes of blacks and oranges, the humor complimentary(I was reminded of An American Werewolf in London(1981) and it’s nice to end a film wanting a sequel for a change. 9/10

Diesel Power

Hush(2008)

A great little British horror movie which plays out like a cross between Road Games(1981), and Breakdown(1997). Making a virtue of not showing its villain’s face or having him talk, it apes Halloween(1978) and Friday 13th (1981) in a couple of scenes while keeping it grittily real. Low budget it may be but never short of ideas, the script is well written, especially the couple’s argument early on. It never lags and the last twenty minutes is nerve-racking, nail-biting with a wonderfully abrupt finish. The only downside is that the story isn’t particularly original, but when it’s remixed as well as this with such a menacingly English twang, who cares? 8/10

O' Toole all at Sea

Lord Jim (1965)

Lord Jim desperately wants to be Laurence of Arabia. Indeed, it could be subtitled ‘Laurence 2: In the Navy,’ so slavish is its devotion to aping that classic epic. Peter O’Toole too, runs through the gamut of emotions as another sensitive, tortured Englishman who is far more under threat from his own doubts than any outside influences. As you’d expect, the cinematography is stunning, the performances good, although Jack Hawkins seems drafted in simply to remind us of Laurence again, while Eli Wallach looking like Ming the Merciless’s thuggish younger brother, and Curd Jurgens doing his best Peter Lorre, keep things chugging along in an action packed but still stodgy middle section. After this the story seems over, but of course a 60s epic with O’Toole can’t have a happy ending so there is an almost tagged on 30 minutes where James Mason unrecognizable under a bowler and beard (until he opens his mouth), turns up for a juicy character part and no other real reason than to creatively force Jim’s assisted suicide, even though this again makes little sense. So, I’m glad I saw it on the big screen in its 70mm splendor, but unlike Laurence this isn’t an epic to repeat. 6/10

Alien 4: Resurrection

On the back of watching Alien 1,2 and 3 in the theater this summer as part of the excellent Paramount Summer Series and Alamo big screen Classics, I rented Alien 4 to round things out.

In this installment, we fast forward 200 years since the alien was disposed of by Ripley on Fiorina 161 in the classic (Terminator) jump into a pit of molten metal . The basic premise is similar in some sense to Aliens, in that man has (again) underestimated the alien, this time trying to tame it in a laboratory so it can be used as a military weapon. Ripley has been genetically re-engineered from blood on the prison planet from the previous installment. She is a hybrid human that given birth to the alien and then is inexplicably kept alive - (and ultimately will help to kill it off)

The ruff tuff group of mercanaries replace the marines of Aliens and the prison folk of Alien 3. The characters are the usual standard ones: the smart one, the pretty one, the harderened fighter, the mechanic (handicapped here) and the I dont care about anyone guy (my favourite). The one character I was not buying was Winona Ryder as the cyborg - she just didnt ring true as a female bishop. The usual stuff happens - alien escapes, kills everything in sight and starts to breed. The twist this time is that the ship gets pointed on a course for earth meaning tradgey if the alien makes it (we will have to watch alien 5 - the real tradgedy). Fortunately the mercanaries escape and destroy the ship and all the aliens although there are some twists and turns at the end. I think if you are a die hard fan you will like this, but to be honest things were nicely wrapped up after Alien 3 and we could have lived without a fourth installment.

I once said to Simon, has there ever been a series where #4 was just fantastic..Police Academy 4, jaws 4, Rambo 4 are all turds (although Rambo is a lot of fun). I had high hopes for Terminator Salvation, but was let down. Overall I am giving a 5/10 because there was nothing new here really.

Just Add Stars to Ruin a Horror Film

The Invasion (2007)

The fourth movie version, based on Jack Finney’s novel ‘Invasion of the Bodysnatchers’ received a critical mauling on it’s opening. Audiences stayed away, and it was generally considered a film damaged from conception, recut to producer’s notes to add more car chases and action, pulling it away from the original focus of a mother’s love for her son, which no doubt was the concept supported by Kidman the star, and the director. While the meddling of moneymen in the narrative is obvious in the film’s random hops from scene to scene, to flashbacks to flashforwards- however stylistically done, too jarring to be on purpose, the main surprise is how entertaining the final film remains, and how no one has commented on how Kidman’s presence would always overbalance a genre film in the first place.
Stars by their very nature neuter and mainstream ideas(some may argue Kidman is an actress but the film was greenlit and sold on her star wattage), and horror/sci-fi which prides itself in breaking new ground, and pushing taboos, will always suffer at the hands of a star. Think Jack Nicholson in Wolf(1994), Tom Cruise in War of the Worlds(2005, although Speilberg’s power kept this roughly balanced), or Robert de Nero in Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein(1994). All of these were pasteurized views where stars think they’re brave for stretching themselves, but actually, fear of alienating their audience means they go nowhere near as far as they should. Kidman, I’m sure signed up because of the mother angle, the director( who is far less powerful in the scheme of things) probably made a mildly sinister art film with a few flecks of sci-fi, similar to Kidman’s other movies Birth(2004), and The Others(2001), the studio panicked when they saw what they had and rather than throw gore at it, as in the case of Halloween 2(1981), The Wolfman(2010), or Exorcist 4(2004), added action to keep the certificate PG-13.

I often joke with my wife after we’ve watched a classic film that it was good but there weren’t enough car chases. The Invasion takes my bad joke seriously- there are two, numerous foot chases, gun battles and an almost Ramboish helicopter rescue. These proliferate the second half of the film and dispel the growing tension of the first. This, it must be said is the weakest of the four adaptations, and yet the concept is so strong, and the tropes so well established by now from previous versions- fear of sleep, police rounding people up, people changing while asleep, that it still works. Sadly, compared to the 70s version, which showed scarily what special effects could do with the idea, or even Abel Ferrara’s gorily messy if more cartoonish effects, we never see a full transformation or human destruction. A couple of scenes aside, there are hardly any effects and nothing to compare with the mutated dog or pod screams so memorable from the Sutherland version, or even the fear of a loved one taken over, shown by Kevin McCarthy in the original.
The acting is good, Kidman was a great choice as since the late 90s she can convey an icy presence of indifference with which she fools the aliens(not pod people- the pods are conspicuous by their absence), and also fitted well into the remake of the Stepford Wives for the same reason. Daniel Craig is solid, and displays the charisma that made him Bond( for nerds, there is an unexpected pleasure seeing him and Jeffrey Wright as a different kind of best friends). Probably the greatest fault, is that like Northam, he never feels that different once changed(the scream is missed again), but that seems to be one of the ideas that this version explodes more than its predecessors- that this is a good alternative and would improve the world, stopping rape, murder, war etc. There is also a nice cameo from professional woman in distress, Veronica Cartwright which provides some needed ties to the franchises past.
Possibly the most damning mistake that this version makes though is in its happy ending, not only do the humans win, but previously infected people are turned back with no ill effects, merely to provide Kidman with a last family shot. Even Ferrara’s version kept an ambiguous ending and to my mind the one they chose, is second only as the kiss of death to a horror movie, to ‘it was only a dream.’ John Ottman’s score deserves special mention for providing music above the material it’s supporting. This is also the first version without a decent target, if the original move could be read as a right wing fear of Communism or a left wing fear of suburban zombies, the second, of the counterculture, the third, militarism and a teenagers distrust of adults, the fourth seemingly can only come up with ‘the power of a mother’s love against all odds,’ which while sweet, doesn’t really cut it. 5/10