Last House on the Left (2009)

Yes - this review is a little late...

Now Horror is not usually my thing, but I duly sat through this flick as the first half of a double bill on Spring Break Thursday (second half was Taken, reviewed by Si below). Typically you don’t get a lot of folks in an R Rated movie at 10am and sure enough, it was Si and I plus one old boy and his popcorn.

I haven’t seen the 70’s original version of this movie and actually I read that it in itself was based on a folk tale set in Europe concerning the rape and murder of a young girl and the inevitable revenge theme that is the central part of the movie.

There was a healthy dose of blood and gore as you would expect from Wes Craven and plenty of murderous revenge with a range of kitchen implements. I also came to the conclusion that the Director is a bit of a pervo with the lingering shots on teenage girls in undies and nudie death shots. Overall pretty satisfying, the good guys won out and there was plenty of suspense and action. I would watch other movies in this genre - no falling asleep in this movie and a 7/10 score.

Bruce Robinson and Richard E. Grant double bill

Bruce Robinson and Richard E. Grant double bill
Withnail and I(1987), and How to get Ahead in Advertising(1989)

Pretty much by accident I ended up watching this pairing at the weekend, and found it pretty interesting seeing them back to back. Both are directed by Robinson, and both star Grant, made within two years of each other in England in the mid-late 80s.
If you’ve seen Withnail and I before, then it needs no introduction. It’s one of my favourite films, and possibly the funniest film I’ve ever seen. No faint praise, and it’s power is that I’m sure most people who’ve also seen it will agree with me, and also, think that they’re the only person who it speaks to personally. If you haven’t, you should order the three disc edition off of Amazon.co.uk immediately and wait for your life to improve drastically in the near future. I saw it for the first time in probably the perfect environment of having just gone to college. Not only does it resonate to every student whose ever worn old, decade defying clothes( and I certainly did, working at a store called Wear it again Sam, taking old suits in lieu of pay, and slicking my long hair back, drunk anything they can get they’re hands on in obscene quantities, lived in a complete dive, not really eaten much apart from toast- all the better for spending on fags and booze, and never had any money, but it also shows that last sliver of life before responsibilities take over. When the most important question is, when does the pub open? and the most important person in your life is not a partner( as Robinson said in an interview, there are no women in the film because when your poor, you know there’s no point trying to get one), but a friend. I could write reams on why Withnail works so well, the superb script with its endlessly quotable lines, the fantastic soundtrack, both in choice and scarcity of songs- young directors take note, you don’t need to over egg the pudding, the great original music, the photography, the four fantastic leads with Grant the standout, and also brilliantly memorable supporting cast- you remember the Coalman, the police, Jakes etc, even though they’re barely on screen, and the fact that while being hilariously, liquid flying out of your nose funny, its also heartbreakingly sad. It’s the end of a heterosexual love affair, with Withnail the dysfunctional(to put it mildly) father, to I’s protective and thoughtful mother. Neither are gay, although you could argue Withnail is, but doesn’t realize it, compared to Uncle Monty’s outrageous all embracing(at least he tries)camp, but this is about three men who care about each other but are also unable to express it and are growing apart in what they want from life. It’s also about Withnail who mainly only cares about himself, which makes it so funny. As soon as I (or Marwood for trivia fans), gets the phone call to say he’s got the part in the play, if not before when the seeds are sown by his audition and willingness to move away, time is running out for this friendship. As Danny says, probably the most succinct line, to sum up proceedings, ‘they’re selling hippie wigs in Woolworths, the greatest decade in history is over and we have failed to paint it black.’It reminds me of the end of college when you realize that the person who you’ve had all of those adventures with for years, isn’t going to be there anymore, and even if they were, it just wouldn’t be the same because everyone has to act sensible now. Withnail is an ode to all of those lost friendships that burnt so bright at the time but were snuffed out so permanently.
How to get Ahead in Advertising at first glance is a completely different kettle of fish. I didn’t manage to see this until later in my life, and again the timing was probably very good, as it’s not just concentrating on the I(sic) as much as on issues that effect all of us globally. It has an adult message.One of the main criticisms that the films has been hit with is that it lets its political message run amock and swamp the story, but I don’t agree with this. It may be an allegory of the difference between materialist and socialist mentality, between greedy consumer society and those who want to preserve and reuse what has always worked, and indeed recycle, and the hypocrisy when the two meet, but its done in such a manic and perverse style that I was hooked throughout. It also starts and ends with two monologues flawlessly performed by Grant any bit as good as anything from Withnail. It’s just that as a whole the film is harder to like. The politics of Withnail-‘shovelled up by Labour, shat on by Tories,’ and darkness-‘I have of late-but wherefore I know not ,lost all my mirth,’ are pushed harder and not just hinted at. Also, it’s end is much more abrupt than Withnail making it feel curiously unfinished, and is also even more ambiguous. It’s certainly not a happy ending but still shows hope in the future, if a muted hope. The supporting cast, Richard Wilson, Rachel Ward, and even a young Tony Slattery play it for realism more than Withnail’s grotesques, but its Grant who manages to find even deeper recesses of manic frenzy to tap into. Many criticize him for always going over the top, but in both of these parts, he gives the audience two fantastic but subtly different performances. Robinson too, freed from Withnail’s mainly static environment shows his growth in some wonderful shots, I was particularly struck by Grant’s collapse onto the floor with bathroom jars smashing around him, and later a long bird’s eye shot of him on horseback, next to a wood so beautiful that these days it would have to be CGI. I recommend both of these films for a look by anyone who likes their laughs to come with a rabid bite. Lets hope Robinson and Grant work together again one day as briefly they were the Scorcese/De Niro of English comedy, and these films although sturdy cult successes deserve a lot more time in the sun. Withnail 10/10 Advertising 8/10

Equilibrium Review

Equilibrium Review

The irony about watching Equilibrium is, that while technically proficient and totally functional at its job, like its protagonists, it leaves you strangely unexcited even in its fight scenes, and not really feeling any emotions towards it, one way or another, once its anticlimactic ending is over. It’s one of those interesting concept B movies that Christian Bale made before his career exploded with Batman Begins, but you have the feeling that like Reign of Fire, this probably sounded better on paper than in execution.
One of the main problems is it constantly reminds you of better and more original stories and movies, like 1984, THX 1138, Fahrenheit 451, Brave New World, and a large dollop of The Matrix. Also, its very concept seems to work against it. As the film is about a Cleric, a security enforcer who stops taking his emotion suppressant drug and starts to question his life, a film full of people not experiencing, or pretending not to feel emotions, doesn’t leave a lot of room for expressive acting. Indeed, I felt watching it that Bale seemed curiously unmoved most of the time, while the villains of the piece seemed to be hamming it up, banging desks and sneering enough to set a bad example to the population they are trying to control, but then maybe the point was they are simply intent on crushing the common man’s spirit but have different or more lax rules for themselves.
Also, after a long build up the ending felt very rushed and pat with Bale only having to contend with killing thirty guards, and without breaking a sweat, and a frankly rubbish at fighting Taye Diggs, who for all his talk, is dispatched far too easily for audience satisfaction. A few shots of the underground overpowering the police while bombs go off in the distance, and your left wondering why they needed Bale at all, and why he didn’t act sooner and save the lives of several key characters.
On the plus side, it is fun to spot the recognizable actor in a very small role, and while non of them are huge stars it’s still odd seeing Emily Watson, Sean Bean, Sean Pertwee, David Hemmings, and weirdest of all for English viewers, commedian Brian( it’s only a puppet)Connelly being beaten up by Batman. Either the director called in some favours, or they all had a few days free, and were in the area. Also, a few scenes do work well, like Bale trying to hide his new found puppy from the authorities, or being grilled by his Nazi youth like son, to increase the tension momentarily. Although they become quickly repetitious, on first appearance, the fight scenes- a mash-up of martial arts and Spaghetti Western gun battles is impressive, and an improvement on the Matrix. However, like my favourite moment, Bean’s line-reading of ‘it is,’ that changes from questioning to agreeing once he’s administered the drug/realized he’s become too obvious, your memory of the film after watching it, quickly changes from thinking it was pretty good, to whatever happens next in your life, which isn’t a good sign. 7/10

Rock and Rolla (2009)

In my opinion a great return to form for Guy Ritchie. I love Lock Stock and Snatch and this is definetely in that genre. Darker than the other two movies for sure, this was a treat to watch, especially tough for the non-English to understand the accents. Gerard butler (one two) is basically Jason Statham (Turkish in Snatch) and Nick Moran (Eddie in lock stock) who runs with shady folk that the audience loves because they are 'geezers' and you guessed it, they get in the usual sort of pickle with a nasty bastard mob boss who likes to dispense with people that piss him off (this time it is a 'lucky' painting that replaces the diamond as the object of affection). It is very witty of course - I particularly liked the crazy Russians that wont die (like 2 Snatch-like Borises). Thandie Newton is definetely a great addition as Stella that hot lawyer- interesting considering how lacking of a female main character the other movies were (except perhaps 'me mah' who loved caravans in perywinkle blue in Snatch). There is a class scene where she dances in a fashion that puts Uma Thurman in Pulp Fiction to shame.

Now you could argue that it is a bit samey as the other 2 movies, but hey, that is what I was in the mood for when I watched this and overall I give it 8 out of 10 on the Thomas Scale.

Taken Review

Taken Review

I’ve seen Taken twice now, and while I know it’s ridiculous and probably bad for me intellectually, I can’t help but be entertained. Infact, I loved it. By twenty minutes in, it’s got me hooked both times, and I’m sure when I see it on dvd, it will do it again. And I’m not alone it seems. While the film was pretty much kicked to death by English critics when it opened there last year, probably miffed that Liam Neeson, a proper actor who was in Schindler’s List and Michael Collins, stooped to muddy his reputation with this, audiences flocked to see it. It was a solid hit. In America by contrast, the box office figures went through the roof, the film is currently heading towards $130 million, and is already one of the biggest hits of 2009. Liam Neeson has had a bona fide hit that he can claim full responsibility for, not just because he’s appearing in a Batman, Star Wars, or Speilberg movie.
But shouldn’t Taken have been a Jason Stratham movie, shouldn’t it have had a strong opening weekend fuelled by its target audience of young men, and finished off grossing about $30 million, not troubling mainstream audiences, having a happy afterlife on dvd, and the chance of a sillier sequel, next time his mother gets kidnapped. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m a big Stratham fan. Infact, I believe I saw three or four of his movies on the big screen last year alone, and a handful of others on dvd, meaning that he and Clive Owen are both getting a good percentage of my box office cash lately, and easily beating off any other actors. I also can’t wait for Crank 2 which looks silly beyond the call of duty even for a Stratham film, which is why I’m vexed by Taken. It really shouldn’t have done that well, even if it did manage what Quantum of Solace promised but didn’t deliver. The Bond franchise was so worried about being serious, emotional depth and living up to Casino Royale, that every blaring action scenes made the film seem almost scizophrenic. Taken, in contrast was the opposite, started off with a little bit of character work, the broadest sketches of characters, Famke Janssen’s shrewish wife, Maggie Grace’s suspiciously old looking but young acting daughter, poor old Xavier Berkley stepdad didn’t even have time to act as a red herring before the film took off at a brainless dash, dragging us with it, and wisely not giving us a chance for any second thoughts, till its end.
But would this have been enough in itself, I mean Statham’s Crank and Transporter series both moved fast, but no wives or girlfriends wanted to see them. I think despite Luc Besson’s undisputed action credentials, Taken’s success comes down to a couple of facts.
Firstly, Liam Neeson can act. Now before people say I’m Strat bashing again, let me put it this way, who out of the two of them has been Oscar nominated? Stratham may look like Laurence Olivier compared to Steven Seagal, but Neeson can actually inhabit a character, and not just talk in a low voice and glare alot. In Taken he, and he alone, partly because he’s the only one given time, builds a character we care about, we realize that he needs to rescue his daughter not just to get her back, not for validiction, but because she is one of the few things keeping him going, indeed, keeping him alive. Neeson makes you care about him, and even when you don’t agree with what he does, you understand why he does it, like shooting Jean-Claude’s wife in a Jack Bauer nod. Neeson single handedly elevates this film and deserves some plaudits for it, just like Daniel Craig received for Bond.
The second reason is more sinister. Taken is one of the most racist and xenophobic films you’ll have seen in a long time, almost to comical lengths. Paris and Europe are portrayed as hotbeds of sex trafficking and gangs, which the police tolerate due to payoffs, and where young American girls are regularly kidnapped and prostituted. This is the nightmare of every far right Republican. This is George W. Bush’s nightmare. There is even an echo of the zero tolerance stance on terrorism in Neeson killing without question, pretty much every nationality he comes across-Albanian, French, English, Arabian, Egyptian. One of his friends pretty much seals the deal early on by calling him Rambo. He is Rambo, in the plot of Commando, with more clothes on, and better conversation. This is America’s war on terror, don’t ask questions, shoot to kill, and kill everyone. It feels as if Neeson kills half of Paris during the film, and then gets on a plane, and comes home to the US. There are no consequences, because he did the right thing, and what he believed he should do. Taken’s success might be the only legitimate subconscious salute the American people give Bush on his presidency. After all, he exploited highly unrealistic fears after 9/11, just as Taken does, and even while complaining about him enough people bought it to vote him in again. Taken’s box office speaks for itself, more than any horror movie, fear sells, fear works. So, there’s a sobering thought, maybe all the people sitting next to me, while I was giggling at the comedy Arabs, were actually not only taking it all seriously but also believing it. 8/10

Deceiver( 1997) Review

Deceiver (Liar UK) 1997

It’s was very interesting watching this movie again, where Tim Roth plays a possible sociopath that two detectives are interviewing, to tell whether he is lying or not, in light of his new series Lie to Me, where Roth spends his time trying to find out the same of other suspects. Deceiver, or Liar to give it, it’s much more succinct, and less romantic and pirate movie sounding English title, wants badly to be thought of in the same company or gang as brain-twisting thrillers The Usual Suspects, and Memento, and while it’s a distant cousin it’s clear that by the end it is not in the same league academically or socially, as suspense and originality tip over into preposterous twists. Suspension of disbelief is jettisoned about the same time that Michael Rooker’s (doing his usual ‘pressure-cooker about to blow’ character, which he’s been perfecting since Mississippi Burning), police detective allows himself to be hooked up to his own lie detector by suspect and arch manipulator Roth, as the weight of evidence and suspicion slides ungainly from one character to another. Also, the fact that his partner, a slightly too gullible to be believable, but refreshingly sympathetic Chris Penn looks on. And that no one else in the station hears any of the noise in the room and knocks. This is also after Roth has, in a previous interview, attacked and beaten up Rooker while in an epileptic state, but before Rooker snaps and starts playing Russian Roulette with Roth against his will. See what I mean?
It’s a shame as the build up of this mainly three hander is well done, the characters of Renee Zellweger’s hooker with a heart of gold showing her star adorability in basically a cameo, and Ellen Burnstyn as genuinely creepy crime boss Mook, both arousing our interest, and although there are too many annoyingly flash, and sooo 90s indie, camera moves and steals from other movies, when the steals remind you of David Mamet that’s no bad thing. Of course the entire movie would falter completely if it wasn’t for Roth and apart from the odd cringe at his American accent he is as dependable as you’d expect. His character is basically idle rich turned bad and is an ironic dry run for the couple of characters he himself would suffer at the hands of in Funny Games. You can even just about allow the use of a steal on Lecter’s Silence of the Lambs escape at the film’s conclusion, even if unlike that classic this doesn’t stand up to too much retrospective scrutiny. The best way to describe Deceiver is that when I saw it for the first time about six years ago I thought it was a lost classic. When I watched it again, even though I still enjoyed it, I can now see why it definitely isn’t. 7/10

RocknRolla Review

RocknRolla Review

At the end of Guy Richie’s new film, there is a threat, or promise, depending on how you felt about the preceeding two hours, that the Wild Bunch will return, Bond style, in ‘The Real RocknRolla.’ Richie himself has promised a trilogy with the same characters which may be a good thing as a lot of them deserved more screen time, and a lot of plot strands were left hanging . Of course many would argue that the film feels like the final chapter to a trilogy already. One that started with Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels, and continued with Snatch, which also represented not by coincidence his most popular steak with audiences . After the trip and fall experiments of Swept Away(never work with children, animals or your marriage partner, see Far and Away or Love, Honour and Obey for further evidence) and Revolver, Richie is back on his old stomping ground of comedy monickered wideboys and villains, cartoon violence and like Lock Stock, a maguffin, in this case a painting that has everyone chasing it, but only serves to expose the real issue, that of an informer in their midst.

So this is Richie back to doing what he does best, and what British audiences at least like him doing best. RocknRolla was a healthy hit in the UK last year. Sadly Americans hardly got a chance to judge on a big screen as Warner’s yet again decided to pull advertising and show their lack of belief in a perfectly good film by opening in a limited number of theatres, and shopping it around for others to buy- describing it as a good little film but too English. Having said that, without the star wattage of a Brad Pitt, it is doubtful that it would have achieved the same success as Snatch, then again it does seem an insult that at this point in his career, Richie has to suffer this indignation, and remember Slumdog Millionaire, another return to favoured issues by an established British critical and cult darling also suffered the same fate at the hands of Warners, but at least had a happy ending in that instance.

Even critics seemed to have warmed to Richie’s return to all things Mockney, rather than chastise him for combing over old ground, and indeed this is not someone basking in the dimming glow of old glories or going through the motions. Comparing the new film to Lock Stock, is rather like comparing the Beatles of Rubber Soul to those animated young men playing mainly covers in a Hamburg cavern. Richie has matured, this is a studious forty year old chuckling at his own jokes while enjoying a whiskey or two, rather than the brash, in your face thirty year old running down the street, brandishing a beer bottle and shouting at the top of his lungs. Visually, Richie has never been better, his skills in direction, editing and framing outstripping his story ideas if anything. As a scriptwriter you can’t help thinking he needs a disciplined collaborator to sharpen or discard some ideas, such as the almost 70s sitcom attitude to character’s gayness.

Of the performances, Tom Wilkinson’s Lenny stands out, although painted in comically broader strokes than necessary, a bigger wallop would have been provided in the denouement by someone more like Michael Gambon in Layer Cake. Mark Strong hopefully will be a carry over to the sequel with his simmering Archie, and it may not be a coincidence that the film ends with the two most interesting characters, him and Johnny Quid talking about the future. Quid, played by Toby Kebbell is equal parts as annoying as hell, and superb, especially in a scene where he provides wish fulfillment for anyone whose been mistreated by a club bouncer. The rest of the cast are all good, if less memorable, often finding themselves at the end of plotlines left in mid air, which may simply be a case of curtailed trilogy arc. Of course, if Richie, currently shooting Sherlock Holmes, never bothers returning to the story, this lack of closure may become more irritating as time goes on. Thadie Newton’s role like her character, so maybe that’s the point, is all tease and no climax, or at least a hastily rushed one, literally. Also, for someone who seems to be the intended leading man, Gerald Butler as One Two, and Elba and Hardy, as Mumbles and Handsome Bob, his loyal sidekicks, are probably the most nondescript so far of Richie’s cheeky protagonist gangs. Infact, after Wilkinson, Kebbell and Strong, you probably have to go all the way down the cast list to Jimi Mistry, as a totally corrupt counsillor for another actor having fun with their part, but not at the audience’s expense.

Of course the film has its moments, a prolonged foot chase that turns slowly from slapstick comedy to almost waking nightmare when Butler can’t shake off the Russians security springs to mind, but Rocknrolla has the strange accolade of making you invest in the characters while also feeling slightly unsatisfied with how they end up. It’s almost as though Richie is throwing away his old toys, and muting himself to show that substance and gravitas are more important than being flash. This is a great sentiment to have but a little bit more flash would have been nice. Notice for instance that none of the violence is shown, only its consequences on the characters. If Richie is the closest England has to a Tarantino, and his style as recognizable, then this is his Jackie Brown. And that is both a praise and criticism. One thing is for sure though, no one is going to spoof Rocknrolla like Adam and Joe did with their toy version of Snatch, called Twat, featuring Vinnie Hooligan and Jim’ll the Fix( a thinly disguised Jimmy Saville as stuffed Poodle). Whether this is because Richie has grown up or lost his relevance, will probably be a debate that rages on unconclusively. 7/10 The Si

Soldier (1998)

Simon 'treated' me to a viewing of the Kurt Russell action flick Soldier , directed by Paul Anderson director of Event Horizon, Mortal Kombat and (let me add this to my BB queue right now) Deathrace. It was basically a nice 95 minute collection of action, cheese and more action.. Simon confessed that it was 4 years since he saw this movie and ' it wasnt as good as he remembered' (shades of Hitman, which I bought because I thought it was great - er, it wasnt.. LOL). I think my favourite scene was the end - a cross between Lethal Weapon 1 and, if I recall correctly, Nowhere to Run (JCVD) - a wet, bloody brawl to the death, with the trademark neck breaker by our hero 'Todd'.

I was hoping for something as good as Escape from New York, hell even something as good as Tango and Cash would have been acceptable. I am afraid it ended up with a 3/10 on the DT scale. Good job I have transporter 3 to watch later this weekend - that could be a step up from Soldier, or maybe not...

Dave's Last 10 movies.

Dave's last 10 movies from Blockbuster (newest first):

Fight Club (1999)
Taxi Driver [Limited Collector's Edition] (1976)
American Gangster [WS] (2007)
Chopper (2000)
Company - Disc 2 (2007)
High Fidelity (2000)
The Company - Disc 1 (2007)
Iron Man [2008] [WS] (2008)
Death on the Nile (1978)
5 Girls (2001)

Where it all began

A shared nationailty, a shared love of movies and a drunken conversation last weekend about how sh*t Jaws 4 is , that is what got Simon and I to this. This blog will give us chance to witter on endlessly about movies and not bore our spouses... lol

By the way, I created this blog in about 2 mintues, so cheers to the blogspot folks for their efficient blog creation model. Top banana.